i’m letting your stories simmer on my heart.
ameera said something to me last week about responding to them, and i told her i wasn’t yet. some of you have dug deep, and i just don’t have words to speak to you, yet, because nothing i can dare to muster saying is the right thing. so, instead, know i’m speaking words of prayer over you, and that the Holy Spirit, as i said in my manifesto, is groaning on my behalf for the words i can’t find and on your behalf for the stories you’ve shared, for the struggles you fight, for, simply, you.
this is also why i have left the blog quiet. i mean, it took me five years of blogging to get to that post, to get to the point where i realized just how this ministry to women – which, if you didn’t know, is the entire reason i started blogging in the first place – could work. and i just couldn’t bear to write anything that might detract from that monumental epiphany.
it’s been a week now, and i feel like i’ve given myself some breathing space to move on. not dismissively, but productively. i can’t rely on this breakthrough to carry me through my faith and this ministry and my friendships with all of you. instead, i’m going to use it as a foundation. i’m not quite sure to what, yet, but y’all have been gracefully flexible with me in the past, so i’m going to ask you to keep doing that.
if you haven’t shared your story, just because i’m reviving the activity on the blog doesn’t mean i don’t want to hear, because i do. desperately. i want to understand those of you who are here and i want to know what it is you’re looking for when you stop by what she saw.
i want to know that because what she sees is a ministry, but a ministry that won’t thrive if it doesn’t know where it’s going. so, this is your turn to take the floor, again, and tell me: what do you want to see here? how do you envision this tiny space on the internet? and how can i, and how can we collectively, cultivate that kind of atmosphere?
margaret and i have an idea on that, which we’ll tell you about thursday, but until then, and even after that, i want to hear what you think.