wisdom, you can have your teeth back.
i wish you would’ve kept them in the first place.
they hurt. also, i don’t understand dental insurance.
also, there is a small part of me that thinks spending more money on my teeth is eighty-four million types of ridiculous when the amount that’s gone into them already is the GDP of an impoverished nation.
if the orthodontist makes it, it was in my mouth. don’t ask me how cavities i’ve had over the years (i.e. how many fillings i’ve paid for).
there is one thing that causes me great and inexplicable anxiety: surgery. there is no reason for this. i have heard of plenty of people having surgery and not one of them has had complications. i am particularly familiar with my friends’ stories of having wisdom teeth removed and none of them had any issues, so i’ve always felt my determination to never have my wisdom teeth removed was kind of silly.
even if i had my ship steadfastly pointed and moving along at some great number of knots per nautical mile to that end.
a few weeks ago i was having dull pain at the site of my lower left wisdom tooth. i took a quick peek inside my mouth, caught a glimpse of bright red, and investigated further.
i will not tell you what i saw but suffice to say i was pretty sure my tooth was rapidly decaying BEFORE MY OWN EYES.
so i flipped out and called the dentist in a panic, thinking i probably shouldn’t have gone two years without going to see them and this was my reward for being so dang stubborn.
i got an appointment with the dentist for that morning. BLESS THEM. they did not have to accommodate me for one hot second but they did for practically the entire day.
i showed up at the dentist to find out it had not been two years since i had been there. it had been four. FOUR. i will never do that again. mostly because fluoride. but also because i could do without panic attacks over teeth decaying in my mouth, warranted or otherwise.
especially since otherwise is what it turned out to be.
apparently, when one experiences pain on one side of one’s mouth due to a wisdom tooth, one ought not to try chewing around it, so to speak, or one will be slamming one’s other wisdom teeth into one’s gums on the other side of one’s mouth.
and which looks like a bloody mess.
literally, a bloody mess.
ask me how i know.
so after all that nonsense, i found out my mouth is, in fact, too small to accommodate wisdom teeth, and i will, in fact, have to have them removed.
the term “white terror” would be appropriate here, i think. because that’s what wisdom teeth are. and that’s what their removal inspires.
and how about the white terror that is the paper my parents’ dental insurance plans are printed on, which i’ve been reading so i can figure out what exactly my insurance covers and where exactly it will cover it, because apparently dental insurance is a regional thing and who would even have known about that except for wisdom teeth?
thank you, teeth. you’ve bestowed your wisdom. YOU ARE NOW FREE TO GO.
i’m not sure my insurance covers that.
tell me your wisdom tooth woes, y’all. and let’s pray the surgeon who takes mine out opts for anesthesia over laughing gas, amen?
|the tooth in the blue circle is the one that kept slamming into my gums, making the tooth in the pink circle look like it was half decayed. this xray looks so much prettier than the reality did at this point.|