Not Me Monday! is a perfect way to start the week, in my opinion. The humor involved (at least the way I’ve seen from MckMama’s posts) just lightens up the dread that ordinarily accompanies poor Monday. MckMama came up with the idea to admit via denial some of her imperfections, of which I certainly have my own fair share. While this idea was begun with 100% MckMama ingenuity, it’s adaptable enough for my own attempt at dry humor, which is probably why I love it so much. You might want to beware, dear reader. You’ll probably be seeing these as many weeks in a row as I can remember to write them. :]
Anyway, let me share with you my past two weeks, since I forgot to document last week’s.
I am not still sadly addicted to Farmville. I have not begun to theorize that if not for Farmville, I might have actually deactivated my Facebook account. Nor am I now also hoping to bypass my brother in levels. He’s currently level 25. I’m level 20. (It’s on, Patrick. It’s on.)
I did not have the uncharacteristic desire to make deviled eggs last week. This would mean that I would be lying to my mother when I tell her I will always avoid cooking at nearly any possible cost, and I do not lie in that fashion. Moreover, I did not act on my uncharacteristic desire, so I certainly didn’t make deviled eggs. Somehow they miraculously appeared, and however they did, I certainly didn’t eat about four of them within three minutes. And somehow I remembered those lessons about sharing from my childhood, because my parents and brother each got about three. But like I said, I didn’t make those deviled eggs, so I’m not quite sure why we’re still talking about them. Nor did I decide that the day my mom takes me back to school, we should stop at Meijer to buy eggs and Italian dressing, so that if I ever got that strange urge to make deviled eggs while at school, I could. But I would never get such an urge. I don’t have that urge now, either. That would be absurd, for me, who like I said avoids the kitchen as much as humanly possible.
I did not rediscover the Left Behind series by Tim LaHaye and Jerry B. Jenkins while watching part of the second movie on television, and so I did not have a crazed desire to reread the books (especially since the movie was mostly inaccurate to the story). I have not spent nearly every spare penny to acquire books two through eight thus far (we already own the first one). And if that were not enough (since it’s not), I did not read a book a day the first three days after I rediscovered the series and did not take a day off before reading the fourth so that I wouldn’t go through the first eight ridiculously fast and be a) extremely impatient in getting books nine through twelve, and b) have forgotten what happened once I actually managed to get my hands on said books.
I was not being driven crazy by being told to go to bed at around ten o’clock last week when I was still on vacation, only because my parents and brother were back to school.
Today was not the first day of the semester. Because I’m a good and responsible student, I did not stay up ridiculously late last night, playing Farmville, journaling, and editing photos. I did not already start procrastinating homework. That would be irresponsible of me. I am certainly not irresponsible, ever. And in the spirit of my extreme responsibility, I did not simply just dump everything I brought back with me to campus on my bedroom floor. It is not still sitting there, since clearly leaving it there would be irresponsible and we already established that does not ever define me.
And you? What have you not done this week?